yeah so i slept with this dude last night and idk we were chatting a bit during the sexy time and for some reason his birthday came up and i was like “wait 25th of september? DUDE me TOO, wtf thats such a coincidence” and he was like “really? we have the same birthday? are u fuckin with me?” and i just looked down at his penis literally inside my vagina and was like “well technically yeah” and he was like haha nice one and high fived me
sorry i only date pokemon masters
i got a valentine this year
What cheat code did u use
not harrassin people for nudes mayb
Sometimes i pick the grass from my neighbors yerd and put it in my own so i? the grass greener oh the other side? No anymore
William looks like he’s thinking, “Geez, son, settle down!” in the first gif! Haha
aquaman you dumbfuck
"i need a movie where there are kickass female characters"
"i need a movie where the main characters aren’t attractive"
"i need a movie with annoying talking animals"
"i need a movie where the main character lives in a swamp"
"i need a movie that has all star by smash mouth on the soundtrack"
Your car hits like a bitch.
His bike fucking exploded.
AND HE JUST FUCKING WALKS AWAY
Does he even have shoes on
This is the greatest knock knock joke in the history of all knock knocks jokes ever told, ever.